I’ve always found “Auld Lang Syne” exceedingly depressing. It’s not meant to be cheery, it’s meant to be contemplative. A musical cue to encourage New Year’s Eve revelers to reflect on the year that’s coming to close before celebrating what’s to come ahead. But I listen to it and just get sad, not reflective. (Same obviously goes for “Same Old Lang Syne,” Dan Fogelberg’s ballad about meeting his old lover in the grocery store in the frozen food section around the holidays, but that one’s meant to be a moper.)
As an adult, I realized that I found the whole new year ― New Year’s Eve, that first week or so of January ― a bummer. Maybe it’s feeling like I didn’t get enough done in the last year, or the outsized pressure to set new goals. (And it’s definitely sometimes that gnarly post-New Year’s Eve party hangover.)
Turns out, I’m not alone in not loving New Year’s.
“Lots of my clients express a feeling of low mood, motivation and sadness approaching the new year,” said Akua K. Boateng, a psychotherapist in Philadelphia. “I’d say about a quarter of my caseload feels it, so it’s prevalent.”
We frame the new year as a “fresh start,” but that can feel overwhelming, said Priya Tahim, a psychotherapist in Washington, D.C.
“People are encouraged to evaluate their lives, compare progress, and set big goals, often without acknowledging how exhausting the year may have been,” she explained. “That combination can naturally trigger sadness or self-doubt.”
What else is at play if you’ve got a case of New Year’s angst like me? Below, therapists like Tahim and Boateng unpack a few factors.
It can be a period of unkind self-evaluation.
As another year comes to a close, we naturally turn inward and begin to take stock of our lives ― and we’re not always kind in our self-assessments.
“We live in a culture of vision boards, grind and constant comparison. It’s easy to feel like you are surrounded by reminders of what has not happened yet ― goals still out of reach, plans that changed and expectations that went unmet,” Boateng said.
“For high achievers, this time of year can become a tender trigger, inviting waves of self-doubt and harsh self-evaluation,” she added.
Perfectionism often shows up as anxious dread about the future and the pressure to have a clear direction, Boateng explained, especially when life feels uncertain or off-course.
“In those moments, it is common to quietly think, ‘I thought I’d be further along by now,’ and to wonder what to do next,” she said.
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“For high achievers, this time of year can become a tender trigger, inviting waves of self-doubt and harsh self-evaluation,” said Akua K. Boateng, a psychotherapist in Philadelphia.
The new year can intensify awareness of time passing.
For people with aging parents, grandparents or other loved ones, the start of a new year can prompt reflection on how little time they may have left with them, said Rebecca Leslie, a psychologist and owner of Best Within You Therapy & Wellness practice in Atlanta, Georgia.
“This awareness can also bring up sadness, grief or even guilt about how the past year was spent,” she said. “It can also result in people thinking about whether enough time or presence was given to important relationships.”
If you love the holiday season, you’re probably sad that it’s coming to a close.
Every year, my mom gets upset when the Christmas tree has to come down, and the local oldies station stops playing the Christmas music they’ve had programmed since Nov. 1.
That’s a common feeling, Leslie said.
“People may have taken time off work. The streets are filled with lights, and stores play cheerful songs,” she said. “With New Year’s comes the end of this season. It is back to reality. It is back to the typical routine. This shift can be similar to how some people start to feel sad on the last day of vacation. Even though they are still on vacation, they know the end is near.”
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“With New Year’s comes the end of this season. It is back to reality,” said Rebecca Leslie, a psychologist and owner of Best Within You Therapy & Wellness practice in Atlanta, Georgia.
Alternatively, you may be burnt out from the holidays.
Emotional and physical burnout from the holidays is common come early January, too.
“Expecting big energy, optimism or transformation while still burned out can feel overwhelming rather than inspiring,” Tahim said.
If you’re already feeling alone, you may feel doubly that way around the holidays.
We tend to associate New Year’s Eve with parties, closeness and celebration. But when there are no clear pathways to any of that ― no invitations, no traditions, no “people” to be with ― the night can quietly amplify feelings of disconnection or simply not being in the mood to celebrate at all, Boateng said.
“For many, social isolation is not just an occasional experience but an ongoing reality,” she said. “The ache of feeling alone, hungry for connection or longing for romance can feel especially hard when social media timelines are full of highlight reels that appear to show the abundance of joy, friendship and intimacy.”
January is also just a gloomy season.
January is in the dead of winter― it’s cold, dark and gloomy ― and that can easily affect your mood.
“Seasonal influences, like seasonal affective disorder, weaken our ability to bounce back from NYE emotional triggers and inner negative dialogue because we may not be going out as much,” Boateng said. “The winter blues are real and create a perfect environmental scenario for New Year’s blues.”
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“For many, social isolation is not just an occasional experience but an ongoing reality,” Boateng said. “The ache of feeling alone, hungry for connection or longing for romance can feel especially hard when social media timelines are full of highlight reels that appear to show the abundance of joy, friendship and intimacy.”
How to deal if you get depressed every new year:
Remember: January isn’t a diagnostic tool or a moral scorecard. We may trump it, but at the end of the day (or year, as it were), it’s just a month. If New Year’s feels activating, try to get back in your body, Tahim said. Pause the self-judgment and focus on regulation first: sleep, routines and emotional containment.
“Sustainable change comes from realistic, values-based goals, not shame-driven overhauls,” she said. “You don’t need a reinvention; you need nervous-system support and consistency.”
As she put it, we need to regulate before we reinvent.
“Limit comparison, practice self-compassion, and remember: Sustainable change happens with consistency and nervous-system safety, not January pressure,” she said.
It’s worth recognizing that these are hard, challenging times outside of whatever’s going on personally for you.
“During these moments, remind yourself that you are doing your best in an unpredictable and changing world,” Boateng said. “You may not be where you wanted, yet, as you would a dear friend, be gentle, be kind and speak with love.”
