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Through breath, compassion, and kind words to yourself, this guided meditation helps you forgive yourself, let go, and move forward with love.
How To Do This Practice:
- Get Comfortable: Sit upright but relaxed. Close your eyes or soften your gaze, and take a few slow, deep breaths. Inhale gently through your nose and slowly, twice as long, through your mouth.
- Bring Something to Mind: Think of a mistake, harsh word, or regret you’re holding against yourself. Notice how it feels in your body, without judging it.
- Acknowledge What Happened: Silently say to yourself: “I acknowledge that I made this mistake.” Take a breath.
- Remember Your Humanity: Remind yourself: “I am human. Being human means I will sometimes fall short.”
- Offer Forgiveness: Place a hand over your heart (or somewhere comforting) and repeat: “I forgive myself for this. May I learn from it and move forward.”
- Close with Kindness: Breathe deeply. Once more, say: “I forgive myself. May I treat myself with kindness.”
- Check In with Your Body Again: Notice if anything feels lighter or softer—maybe your breath, your shoulders, or your chest. Allow yourself to rest in that shift, however small.
- Take one final deep breath: When you feel ready, gently open your eyes and return to your day.
Today’s Happiness Break Guide:
DACHER KELTNER is the host of The Science of Happiness podcast and is a co-instructor of the Greater Good Science Center’s popular online course of the same name. He’s also a professor of psychology at the University of California, Berkeley.
Related Happiness Break episodes:
A Meditation on Original Love: https://tinyurl.com/5u298cv4
Loving Kindness Meditation: https://tinyurl.com/2kr4fjz5
Who Takes Care of You: https://tinyurl.com/5xmfkf73
A Note to Self on Forgiveness: https://tinyurl.com/y53tkn87
Related Science of Happiness episodes:
Nine Steps to Forgiveness: https://tinyurl.com/vb7kk5ky
How to Show Up For Yourself: https://tinyurl.com/56ktb9xc
Who’s Always There for You: https://tinyurl.com/yt3ejj6w
How Holding Yourself Can Reduce Stress: https://tinyurl.com/2hvhkwe6
This episode is part of “Putting the Science of Forgiveness into Practice,” a multiyear project run by the Greater Good Science Center and supported by the Templeton World Charity Foundation (TWCF). Learn more about forgiveness on TWCF’s Discover Forgiveness website.
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We’d love to hear about your experience with this practice! Share your thoughts at happinesspod@berkeley.edu or use the hashtag #happinesspod.
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Transcription:
DACHER KELTNER: This episode is part of “Putting the Science of Forgiveness into Practice,” a project by Greater Good Science Center that’s supported by the Templeton World Charity Foundation.
Hi, this is Dacher Keltner. On Today’s Happiness Break, we’re practicing self-forgiveness.
We also know forgiving ourselves helps break cycles of rumination and self-criticism. Instead of getting stuck in regret, self-forgiveness allows us to acknowledge our mistakes with honesty and compassion, and then to move forward with a sense of growth and responsibility.
When you’re ready, let’s begin.
Find a comfortable position, sitting upright but relaxed. You can close your eyes if that feels right, or soften your gaze.
Take a deep breath in… and a long breath out.
Now, bring to mind something you’re holding against yourself – maybe a small mistake, a harsh word, or a decision you regret. Notice how it feels in your body. Is there tightness anywhere? A heavy feeling? Just observe it without judgment.
Now, silently say to yourself: “I acknowledge that I made this mistake.”
Breathe in again through your nose, and out slowly through your mouth.
Then say: “I am human. Being human means I will sometimes fall short.”
Again breathing in, and a long slow exhale.
Place a gentle hand over your heart or another place that feels comforting.
Silently repeat: “I forgive myself. May I learn from this and move forward.”
One more time: “I forgive myself. May I learn from this and move forward.”
Now say: “I forgive myself. May I treat myself with kindness.”
Feel your breath flowing in and out.
Take one final deep breath and when you’re ready, open your eyes.
Feel the warmth of your hands. Notice any small shifts – perhaps a sense of softening, or just being here with yourself.
Thank you for practicing self-forgiveness today.
