If you’re a fan of personality tests — like many of us, or at least the self-reflective, psychology-obsessed ones are — you may have taken the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator, a self-reported personality assessment.
One aspect it tests for is whether you’re an introvert (aka, you energize by being alone or with a small group of close loved ones) or an extrovert (aka, you energize by being around a bunch of people). Even if you haven’t taken the test formally, you probably have an idea as to which of those personality types you align more with. Knowing your personality type can be a fun way to understand yourself and those around you, and ensure you get the kind of self-care you need.
“Introvert” and “extrovert” are the most common terms, but they’re not the only ones. You might have heard “ambiverts” recently. Ambiverts are essentially extroverted introverts. But even that’s not all: Bring in the term “otrovert,” coined by Dr. Rami Kaminski in his 2025 book ”The Gift of Not Belonging.”
Let’s dive into what this pop psychology term means and if it applies to you. Ahead, therapists explain what exactly an “otrovert” is, how it’s similar to and different from introverts, and what they want both otroverts and their loved ones to remember.
What Is An ‘Otrovert,’ And How Does It Compare To An Introvert?
If you feel like an introvert and present like an extrovert, you might be an otrovert.
“An otrovert is someone who may appear extroverted, meaning they gain energy from external sources and relationships and often do not seem to need as much alone time, but who actually has a more introverted nervous system,” said Amelia Kelley, a trauma-informed therapist, author, podcaster and researcher. “It describes someone who recharges best alone or with less stimulation, yet is well-adapted at expressing externally.”
What that might look like, she continued, is someone who is comfortable being the center of attention at times, appears confident and functions well socially, but who also needs more downtime to return to baseline.
“The similarity lies in where they regain their energy, center and sense of well-being, often alone or in quieter settings where they can engage with fewer people in a deeper way,” Kelley added. “The difference is that otroverts are often more comfortable and skilled in social environments, especially when those settings require expression of leadership, such as a company party or managing a child’s birthday party.”
This specific introvert-extrovert combination can make them feel like an “outsider.” This term is key to what an “otrovert” is; in fact, “otro” is Spanish for “other.”
“[This is] not because they’re ‘antisocial’ or disengaged,” clarified Cheryl Groskopf, a therapist at Evolution to Healing. “They are often extremely observant, attuned and sensitive to social dynamics, but it can leave them feeling as if they’re always standing a ‘step back.’ They can want deep, genuine connection while also feeling chronically unseen, misunderstood or dismissed in social groups.”
This explanation illustrates another key difference between introverts and otroverts: how they feel in social settings.
“Otroverts may enjoy conversation, connection, even group settings, but still leave feeling unanchored or separate,” Groskopf said. “They just didn’t quite register the environment as safe, resonate or mutual.”
What Therapists Are Begging Otroverts To Remember
Many times, extroverts are praised for their extroverted qualities. This can even turn into a feedback loop, Kelley explained, where the praise encourages them to continue behaving the same way and to engage in more social settings.
While extrovert behaviors are great, introvert ones are, too. It’s perfectly OK and good to have your “introvert moments.”
“Try to stay connected to your internal needs and experiences rather than relying only on external reinforcement,” Kelley encouraged. “It’s normal to need breaks, especially during overwhelming seasons of life, seasonal transitions such as ’wintering’ or during hormonal shifts related to menstrual cycles, pregnancy or menopause.”
Groskopf spoke to the “outsider” piece, urging you to know that feeling like an outsider doesn’t mean you truly don’t belong (or that something is “wrong” with you). Feelings aren’t facts.
“You may have learned early on how to read the room, adapt or stay slightly on guard in social spaces,” she said. “That can come from growing up emotionally unseen, misunderstood or needing to self-contain parts of yourself to stay connected to others. Your nervous system got very good at observing before fully joining.”
The work, she continued, isn’t about becoming more social — it’s about finding spaces where you don’t have to “mask,” bend or shapeshift to feel understood.
What Therapists Are Begging People Who Love Otroverts To Remember
What Groskopf wants otroverts’ loved ones to remember is similar: Otroverts don’t need to be coaxed, fixed or pulled closer.
“What helps most is consistency, genuine curiosity and emotional presence,” she said. “Let them take up space at their own pace. Listen without rushing to respond … They just need to be met where they are.”
Kelley had a similar point: expecting and allowing for flexibility in the otrovert and your time together.
“Some days they may want to stay at the party until it ends, and other days they may not want to go at all,” she said. “There is nothing to fix. The most helpful response is support, flexibility and respect for their changing needs.”
