When homing in on how to be happier, it’s easier to concentrate on all the negatives you need to eliminate in your life: Toxic positivity, comparing yourself to others, those weekly phone calls from your mother-in-law.
Weeding out unpleasant things can help, but it’s just as important to take an additive approach and think of small things you could add to your life to boost your spirits. With that in mind, we recently asked our readers to share the one thing they started doing daily (or in some cases weekly) that made them considerably happier. See what they had to say below.
Responses have been lightly edited for clarity and length.
Picking up the phone at least once a day to call a family member.
“I always check in with my Grandma Gail. Even if the conversations are lighthearted, they deepen our bond and understanding of each other. It’s amazing how something as simple as connecting with a loved one in this way can bring such joy and fulfillment to my life.” ― Kim Murstein, co-host of the Excuse My Grandma podcast
Before I go to sleep, I put my phone to bed, too.
“I established an electronics curfew! No social media, internet scrolling or any device for the hour before I go to bed.” ― Stacy B.
“About three years ago I stopped plugging my phone in next to my bed at night. It has made a world of difference in my sleep and mental health. Now my phone gets charged in the kitchen next to the coffee pot and I don’t look at it right before bed or first thing in the morning. Game changer!” ― Betsy E.
“No social media, internet scrolling or any device for the hour before I go to bed,” one reader said.
I started considering what I love about my spouse, instead of what annoys me.
“One thing I started doing 10-15 yrs ago is any time my husband irritated me or annoyed me, which is often, I would think of something positive about him that I admire and appreciate — and there are many! It really, really changed our relationship for the better, which makes both of us happier.” ― Angela B.
I started adding ”…and that’s OK” to the end of my sentences.
“There are many times where saying, ‘…and that’s OK’ helps to take the sting out of life’s inevitable ups and downs: I just dropped a tub of hummus on the floor…,’ ‘my son has head lice…’ ‘I forgot to change our holiday flights…’ AND THAT’S OK.
Instead of going into a doom spiral of something I haven’t achieved, or have spectacularly messed up, this simple three word phrase helps me to realize that everything I have to contend with is workable. As a dating coach I also find this is a great phrase to stop people from sliding into analysis paralysis, and to connect them with the actions that they need to take to create the change they want.” ― Hayley Quinn, a London-based dating coach
I use good smells to improve my mood.
“My new hyper focus is perfume, and it’s been so fun learning about different notes, new releases, various brands, how it changes over time on your skin. I’ve made a point to use perfume I absolutely love, even if I’m at home all day in leggings and a t-shirt. Getting whiffs of a fragrance I love instantly puts me in a good mood. Plus, I love the ritual of putting in on in the morning, after a shower, and before bed. It’s indulgent self care and it makes me so content.” ― Natalya Jones, a writer who lives in Florida
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“Getting whiffs of a fragrance I love instantly puts me in a good mood,” one reader said of her new perfume fixation.
I picked up my late mother’s hobby.
“I started sewing like my mother. When mom passed, I wanted to use her nearly new machine to keep connected to her memory. Years later I have a heavy duty machine and regularly make purses, totes, and backpacks to keep my zen.” ― Anne G.
I started validating myself instead of looking for validation in others.
“Something small I started doing a while ago is being intentional and consistent in recognizing and validating myself. In every aspect of my life. This gradually helped me take my power back from seeking validation from others and leaning too much into fulfilling others’ expectations. This has made me drastically happier because I now see myself, hear myself, and care for myself much better. Before you can effectively navigate pouring from an empty or full cup, I believe having the capacity to recognize how beautiful your cup is enables you to embody the power and love you deserve to receive and share.” ― Dagny Zenovia, a writer who lives in Ghana
I take long hikes every weekend.
“I go for increasingly longer hikes on the weekend. After a long recovery from an operation last year which took away the ability to eat and speak for months, I was looking for something to do in nature. I started 30 minute mini walks, which exhausted me at first, but eventually I built up to three to four hours. I didn’t think I’d enjoy it as much as I do! I smile so much and it’s helped sort out my stress, just breathing out. It makes me laugh how I’ll drive to the local shop two streets away, yet will do 16,000 steps around lakes, up hills, over rickety bridges with my dog. While I’m out, I take the odd photo. I’m actually just back now from two locations in one day.” ― Zoe J.
“I started 30 minute mini walks, which exhausted me at first, but eventually I built up to three to four hours,” one reader said.
I allow myself to look at the headlines once or twice a day.
“I used to be a journalist so I always had a news channel on in the background— I always had to be the first to know. Now, not watching the news makes me happy. Don’t get me wrong. I still keep up. I want to be informed. But now I check the headlines once, sometimes twice, a day. I’m not as depressed.” ― Barbara B.
I learned to avoid negative thought loops.
“I learned not to ‘follow’ every thought that arises. It helps me not overthink and ruminate. I am no longer a slave to my mind.” ― Sherry B.
I became a Duolingo master.
“I play Duolingo every morning. I have 868 days of Portuguese under my belt, and have been to Lisbon twice and Rio once since starting.” ― Rachael Adele L.
I picked up an old hobby.
“During the COVID lockdown, I started playing the piano again, something I hadn’t done since college. It exercises a different part of my brain, reduces stress, and makes me happy to fill our house with music. I found a new composer I love to play, and smile when my husband and kids clap from wherever they are in the house when I finish!” ― Aimee B.
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“[Playing piano] exercises a different part of my brain, reduces stress, and makes me happy to fill our house with music,” one reader said.
I picked up a hobby I always wanted to pursue.
“I started building miniatures and book nooks. I always wanted a haunted dollhouse when I was little, and nothing makes me happier than when I sit down and make tiny, witchy pieces now as an adult!” ― Bec Anne
I foster cats and kittens.
“I began fostering cats and kittens for a local shelter two years ago and I’m still going. It brings me joy and satisfaction.” ― Anthea H.
I planted a salsa garden.
“I recently planted a salsa garden! I make and can my own salsa and it’s not only fun but delicious!” ― Ginger M.
I put myself first.
“Recognizing that it’s ok for me to have a life of my own. I am not just a daughter and a sole caretaker.” ― Maggy S.
I started challenging myself physically.
“I play pickleball! It’s humbling to be a beginner at something again and exciting to challenge myself physically.” ― Marissa F.
“I’d recommend daily walks if you’re able. I started trying to walk at least one mile every day, and it truly improved my mental health, when paired with antidepressants vs. just taking antidepressants alone.” ― Sydni W.
“My doctor told me that boxing is good for brain health so I decided to give it a try. I do private lessons twice a week and I have become very quick on my feet and feel a sense of euphoria after each lesson. It has definitely improved my mood and has made me a happier person in general. I will never get into a boxing rink, but I sure will have fun practicing for a match. Get ready, Mike Tyson!” ― KarenLee Poter, the co-host of the podcast “Sex Talk With My Mom”
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“I play pickleball!” another reader said. “It’s humbling to be a beginner at something again and exciting to challenge myself physically.”
I prep my coffee the night before.
“Before bed, I prep my coffee and set a start timer for ten minutes before my alarm. Waking up to fresh coffee is such a delight.” ― Carrie Jade
I make sure my garage is organized.
“Keeping my garage clean and organized has made such a difference. It’s the first thing I see when I come home and it’s wonderfully calming.” ― Gigi C.
I read before bed every night.
“So simple: I read a book before bed. Used to scroll through Facebook, which isn’t necessarily relaxing. Now I read and sleep better and wake up feeling more rested.” ― Geniece H.
I finally got my dream dog.
“I got my dream dog last year, Sweet Caroline, a Yorkie. A walk in the park, some grooming time, and brief training sessions bring me joy throughout the day.” ― Susan F.
Susan F.’s dog, Sweet Caroline.
I have my husband bring me my favorite treat every morning.
“My husband, who is not usually overly affectionate, brings me a Cherry Dr. Pepper Zero and a yogurt every morning. It is there when I wake up and it makes me happy every morning. We’ve been married 48 years.” ― Jennifer B.
